This year, organizers had arranged an event entitled “Five minutes and a lifetime of love” to take place at Pride House, otherwise known as the capital’s Kulturhuset. The idea? To consecutively marry around 20 gay or lesbian couples during a two-hour period on a Friday afternoon.

I only found out this week it had been cancelled. When I called Stockholm Pride to ask why, I left an answerphone message and received no response. When I called Kulturhuset they cited “lack of interest” as something of a hearsay reason.

Gay wedding. Big deal. Nice outfits though. Photo: Mathilda Piehl

It’s been over a year now since Sweden legally entitled gay couples the right to marry. So if the event was called off because couples weren’t exactly queuing up to tie the knot, should we really be surprised? Making a statement or public spectacle is not the way everyone wants to celebrate their big day.

Sweden’s gay community fought long and hard for same-sex marriage legislation to pass –  perhaps they just don’t feel the need to stick out of the crowds any more.

On the other hand, one wonders whether they are just happy to put up and shut up after getting want they wanted. They need to make a scene and their voice heard in parts of the world that are not as liberal as Sweden when it comes to gay issues. For me that goes hand-in-hand with their party-love-politics philosophy.

But they are getting married. We know that. According to Statistics Sweden, 774 same-sex couples married in 2009 from May 1st, the day the law was introduced.

A wedding shouldn’t be a PR stunt. I’ve never really pondered how they should be much before now. But during a love-blogging month along with a proposal in hand, I guess it’s about time to start.

Now that’s what I call a happy ending.

To my knowledge, my sambo doesn’t wear dresses either. So if I were to ask myself who wears the trousers in our relationship, I’d say we probably both share pair of baggy shorts.

This came to my attention when reading an entertaining and informative blog post – which was forwarded to me.

Very well written by a US expat in Stockholm, the author argues that efforts to promote gender equality has effectively resulted in the emasculation of Sweden’s male population.

I agree that men up here in the north aren’t the pillaging Viking warriors of yesteryear and are somewhat different in physical style and emotional manner to their global counterparts. Some might say effeminate, others might say sensitive. Some women like that and macho men often don’t.

Sweden, indeed, offers a haven for men who have moved here from abroad to meet with their metrosexual fantasies. If they so wish. A married guy I know from a hard, industrial English city, now living in Stockholm, admits he can enjoy wearing pink shirts nowadays.

A Swedish man's place is in the kitchen Photo: Lena Granefelt/Image Bank Sweden

In fact, it’s more likely he’ll be complemented than condemned for his chosen colour of attire. A whole rainbow of pastel shades, it seems, are positively encouraged by men.

Another example where men feel demonstrably more at home in Sweden is in the kitchen. Rivalling male buddies go head-to-head in dinner party wars, competing with their chilled coulis and comparing their latest culinary gadgets.

But having travelled round the country on a two-month tour last summer, it’s fair to say I have seen my fair share of Sweden.

On the way, I met what I’d hazard to say where archetypal real men too: lumberjacks and gravediggers, reindeer herders and sailors.

Up in the Torne Valley, the northern border of Sweden and Finland, the locals use the derogatory term – knapsu – a patronizing label for men who are in touch with their feminine side.

Generalizing my eight years in Sweden, I have to say the men are not what I’d call macho. But this is a debate that mirrors the capital city v small town discussions and the growing generations of ‘new men’ back in England too.

I say this is not only a Swedish phenomenon, but like many things, it’s an area where the country is leading the way for better or worse.

Pretty much before the nuptials took place, it was heralded as a PR flop and the bunch of brand Sweden’s marketeers had failed in their attempt to make the marriage a magnet for tourists.

Room reservations were typical for a June weekend; locals hoping to cash in their city center apartments were left out of pocket while extra trains especially for wedding commuters to the capital went off the rails.

The Swedish Chamber of Commerce (Svenska Handel) expected local business in the Stockholm region to soar and instead reported disappointing losses in comparison with their projections.

Ahead of the big day, this was the news that was hitting the headlines – making as much noise as what the dress would look like and what ingredients would be topping the cake.

In an attempt for both brand executives and journalists to eat their words, I read an article in quality daily Svenska Dagbladet (SvD) last week pointing towards a late take-off for wedding tourism.

Hardly quantitative. and purely based on unofficial chats with visitors on the streets, the Stockholm Visitors Board say the wedding is a key reason that sparked interest from this season’s tourists to come to the Swedish capital..

That Stockholm had to wait for the desired effect to materialize was something Thomas Brühl, managing director of Visit Sweden, considers normal.

“We actually never thought that loads of tourists would come to the wedding itself,” he told SvD. “But we hoped it would create some kind of curiosity around Sweden and we’d see the effects later on. This street survey points towards such an effect, even though we don’t exactly know how tourism has been affected by the wedding.”

The after-wedding boom begs the question as to whether Sweden could ever brand itself as a honeymoon destination? After the less than successful wedding coverage – I wonder what the PR people make of that.

Intrigued, I got in touch and chatted more to the person behind the ad – Christianne Beck – an Englishwoman who has recently moved to Gothenburg. She is currently studying event management and wedding planning (yes, apparently it’s a bona fide subject).

That came as a surprise until I learnt the following. “The average wedding takes between 200-300 hours to plan,” Christianne told me.

Christianne - watch this space!

I did the math. I was banking on six months preparation, which – at the top end of her estimate – avergages 11 and a half hours of a week.

“The stress and workload of liaising with up to 40 different suppliers, and spending hours of your own time planning a wedding can mount up,” Christianne adds.

“We have busy lives today with full-time jobs and families some people wouldn’t know where to start. So hiring someone that knows their stuff can be a massive benefit not only to your stress levels but also to your event itself.”

Christianne’s offer began to look more promising by the minute. By no means do I intend my wedding to become a part-timc chore, but I’m just not a girl who has spent her life planning and dreaming about her big day. Wasting time pondering over the paper quality of the envelopes in which to send invitations is not something that would come high on my list of things to do.

For those who value such detail, I bow down to their attitude and attention to detail. And they do exist. Weddings have become big business.

“Large-scale weddings are fairly common in the UK and the US,” Christianne adds. “In the US, you can expect 400-500 guests and by far Americans spend the most on their wedding day.”

Since moving to Sweden only months ago, single Christianne has learnt some valuable facts which could affect her future career.

Firstly, she hasn’t failed to notice that the streets here are full of Swedish men who have been inherently gifted with good looks. A little too early to say, perhaps, but she may well be organizing her own wedding here one day.

More pressing to her success is understanding the notions of lagom and Jantelagen – how their essence spreads throughout society and even impacts the wedding industry.

“I’ve learnt that Swedes don’t really like to spend a lot of money on their wedding day,” she says. “Even if they are rich it’s not okay to show off your wealth.”

So, you shouldn’t be try to be better than anyone else, nor try to outdo anyone else’s nuptials with a superior brand of envelopes. In Sweden it’s about sticking to a wedding that’s just right, following the trends and ensuring it’s not to big and not too little.

Hmmm, Christianne may have her found her first customer.

Should they care about being upfront with their feelings because they were two women, girlfriend and girlfriend? Not around here. I live on the island of Södermalm – often referred to as the bohemian quarter, it has a socially liberal reputation.

Gay couples displaying their affection are a pretty common sight in these parts and rarely would anyone turn a head on spotting two men hugging or hand in hand.

A very public display of gay affection. Photo: Stockholm Pride

In the last decade, Sweden has worked hard in implementing measures to support the homosexual community and prevent discrimination.

But, as an article I wrote two years ago indicates, conservative criticism lives on. For example, there is still away a long way to go for traditional attitudes in the countryside to adapt to the open minds of the cosmopolitan capital.

Sentiments among my gay friends reveal this is still very much the case today and is not something totally unique to Sweden either.

In 2008, Stockholm hosted Europride – a large-scale pride event drawing crowds across the continent.  Over the next two years, Stockholm Pride’s international solidarity fund contributed financial help and practical support for Europride 2010, which concluded in Warsaw this week.

The choice of the Polish capital was hailed as a breakthough – the first international Pride festival to be held in Eastern Europe, where homosexuals in many places face daily inequality and prejudice.

Not only does Sweden have to continue to concentrate efforts on gay right’s issues at home, supporting Pride events abroad allows the country to spread its message across borders.

Sweden is perceived as a progressive, gay-friendly country and continues to prove itself, with the same-sex marriage law having passed its first year anniversary.

Out and about in my neighborhood, I also see the rainbow flags are flying in preparation for this year’s Stockholm Pride, which runs from July 26 – August 1.

On second thoughts, perhaps I even got it wrong.  The couple I spotted could have well been wife and wife.

Launched in 2008, it aims to turn traditional online match-making on its head by giving “Sweden’s active singles a more fun single life, full of energy and things to do.” It fulfills all the criteria of a dating site. Fill in your details, what you are looking for and surf the photos for any potential pickings

But for many it’s simply about finding like-minded people to share good times with. One member I know – divorced and with kids – says these days she sees herself as a ‘professional’ single. She’s looking for a bit of a laugh and a flirt rather than long-term romance. Another is a 30 something bachelor who has never been married and isn’t hoping to in the foreseeable future.

She looks happy. She's probably single. Photo: Henrik Trygg/Image Bank Sweden

“Swedes marry less, cohabit more, live in single-person households more, and marry at later ages than the people of any other rich country in the world.” It’s the opening line of a 2008 article in the Scandinavian Review entitled “Modern Sweden: The declining importance of marriage.”

It’s a good read and points to some sociological reasons why this trend has occurred, from gender quality and secularization to the sambo phenomenon – living together without tying the knot.

Indeed, in the last 50 years the number of marriages has gone down while the population and divorce statistics have increased.

But it’s rather more to do with the rising art of being single and happy with it. Indeed, Stockholm is believed to be home to more single people per head of population than any other capital.

Perhaps that’s one contributory factor as to why the phrase ‘särbo’ has come into more common usage of late – being in a relationship but not living together. I’d never heard of it when I moved here eight years ago. But even more compelling is the new expression in town – ‘självbo’.

Literally meaning ‘living alone’ it has been coined by those who want to get rid of the negative connotations surrounding the world single. For this rising Swedish community it’s their chosen way of life.

So after a request for recommendations among my Facebook friends, I’ve compiled a top five list of Swedish love songs. There’s everything from harmonious classics to quirky lyrics but, as for whether they’re really the greatest, I’ll let you be the judge.

Artist: Lisa Nilsson
Song: Himlen Runt Hornet (Heaven’s Around the Corner) 1992
What it’s about: Sick and fed up of being single and then realizing that love was right in front of your eyes. You’ve waited patiently and, not before time, met the one and know you’ll never be alone again.

Artist: Håkan Hellström
Song: Jag hatar att jag älskar dig och jag älskar dig så mycket att jag hatar mig (I hate that I love you and I love you so much that I hate myself) 2006
What it’s about: Still being in love with an ex who has moved on and is completely over you. You realize breaking up was a big mistake and now your friends are telling you to move on because your getting rather obsessed about it.

Artist: Tomas Ledin
Song: I natt är jag din (Tonight I’m Yours) 1977
What it’s about: A no-nonsense message to pull down the blinds and get ready for a night of passion. Quite frankly we’ve done enough talking now and I’m ready to “offer you my body on a silver platter.”

Artist: Cecilia Vennersten
Song: Den Vackraste (The Most Beautiful) 1995
What it’s about: Watching over your loved one while they are sleeping peacefully and coming to the conclusion that your love for them, their love for you and your love for one another is the most beautiful thing you know. They obviously don’t snore then.

Artist: Ulf Lundell
Song. Öppna landskap (Open Landscapes) 1982
What it’s about: The joker in the pack, this epic is a tribute to the Swedes’ love of nature. They’re at their happiest in the freedom and tranquillity of the outdoors, by the ocean and while making homemade schnapps. I suppose it makes a change from being content to have your loved one by your side.

It’s not the first time. I’ll often find a note on the kitchen table that’s more than a mere shopping list. A hand-written card is an extra-special treat if he’s going away. And once he dedicated a poem to me that was published on the web.

Then there’s my least favourite means of romantic correspondence – when he delves into my make up bag, manages to locate my most expensive lipstick and proceeds to draw love hearts on the bathroom mirror with it. Yet, I still polish it off with a smile rather than a pout.

And that’s because it breathes new life into the widely-held belief that the art of hand-written communication is dying out in the digital world we live in. Well, almost.

Call me old fashioned but let us not forget the feeling of anticipation and excitement when opening an envelope from an admirer. While pen was put to paper, careful consideration went into those chosen words. The sentiments took time to write and can be kept forever.

Compare that to one of today’s preferred means of communication – the text message or SMS. “Thx 4 B ing U. Luv U” doesn’t quite cut it for me. It’s a throw away remark, produced, received and read in seconds. That’s without mentioning my contempt for poor grammar.

The technologically sound Swedes are world leaders in text messaging. Practically, yes I do like the convenience of buying bus tickets with my phone, but personally I’d prefer someone to call and tell me they’re cancelling our dinner date with half a day’s notice.

Keen to maintain their position at the top of the global SMS league, a national competition even allows Swedes to keep their fingers and thumbs nimble.

Swedes and love letters, however, do have a contentious history to share. Written exchanges between Greta Garbo and fellow Swedish actress Mimi Pollack were published in 2005.

The book Djävla Älskade Unge (Bloody Beloved Kid) is a first-hand exposé of their affair during the 1920’s and bi-sexuality, which had largely remained secret.

Earlier this year, 78-year old Swede Gunilla von Post auctioned her collection of love letters and telegrams from John F. Kennedy in the 1950s. For a pricey sum they revealed a passionate fling and his infidelity before becoming US President.

To end this note on a good one, there is the beautiful tale told by Prince Daniel at his wedding to Crown Princess Victoria this year. Before leaving for a month-long official duty overseas, the princess chose to stay up all evening rather than catch up on some sleep. In the morning he found 30 hand-written letters addressed to him – one for every day they would be parted.

A romantic act as such cannot be deleted from memory with a push of a button.

At this point I should add this post comes with a warning: read at your romantic peril – it could get rather mushy.

This something is what I have long wished for, hoped for and dreamed about. The P word. It’s happened.

No, I’m not pregnant. He proposed. I said yes. Then I cried. Then I smiled. And as I type now I can’t help but focus my attention on the sparkling ring adorning my finger.

After the question was popped, I proudly spent the rest of the day showing it off, proving I could be ambidextrous and do everything left-handed whilst my right side remained lame.

The evidence: trying hard to keep a low profile amid city center celebrations

Engagement, getting hitched, living happily every after – it’s a subject that I have brought up in various guises with my partner before.

He may have missed my passing glances at jewellery shop windows, a teary eye during my best friend’s big day or the sight of me flicking through the pages of bridal magazines at the hairdressers.

He certainly hasn’t missed my more direct advances, having asked him to marry me on a number of occasions.

Admittedly, it was a bit of fun. I’d casually drop it into conversation on the bus, over the breakfast table, or while he was doing the washing up. I’m pushing 34 and never been asked. Surely, it was worth a try?

But the only response I got was silence. He made it clear it was his job to do the asking – it’s the Swedish way he said.  I disagreed with his sentiments but waited patiently and the proposal took place on a recent trip to my birthplace, the city of Hull on the northeast coast of England.

We had taken a walk along the shoreline and completely unexpectedly he did the deed.

He wouldn’t have known that on that very spot, over 100 years ago, thousands of Swedish emigrants landed on English soil – the first leg of their journey on their way to a better life in America.

They had voyaged from Gothenburg – my now fiancé’s home city – and after docking in Hull they would take the train to Liverpool or Southampton where the big ocean liners would greet them.

To me that was rather poignant and very beautiful – a proposal in a place linking both our backgrounds and future together.

First things first, the chances of meeting an attractive Swede are fairly high. Sweden’s reputation as a nation of beautiful people precedes them. I live here. It’s true. And I’m used to it.

After a number of years living here up north – and complete with my own beautiful partner – I no longer feel the need to walk down the street, in constant amazement at the symmetry of chiselled jaw lines.

On that note, my sambo just walked through the door and told me he had been whistled at by a group of teenage girls. It made his day.

You can't really say they're ugly. Photo: Nicho Södling/Image Bank Sweden

A slightly more scientific case in point – but by no means conclusive – is the number of Swedes accepted to the Denmark–based dating website beautifulpeople.com

Applicants are judged on face value alone. They can join if other members deem them attractive enough to mingle with other beautiful singles.

A recent survey found that Swedish men have the highest rate of acceptance to the site. Swedish women also fare well, coming in second place to their stunning Scandinavian sisters in Norway.

All that being said, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and seeing is believing. Which is why British dating coach Jeremy Soul ended up moving to Stockholm last year.

We met when I was assigned to write an article, following him and his protégés in action. Their mission was to test techniques to chat up women on the streets of the capital.

I recall he thought Swedish women were some of the most beautiful in the world. They also found him hard to resist, not because he’s tall, blonde-haired and blue-eyed. He isn’t. But he was able to charm them through the language of love. And apparantly, that’s not Swedish.

The fact that Swedes love to converse in the English language and practise with native speakers gave him the upper hand with the opposite sex.

So he never bothered with “kommer du hit ofta?” as an opening line. And his style was far too sophisticated for the English equivalent “do you come here often?”

As for whether the people are really beautiful as they say, I guess you’ll have to pay more regular visits to Sweden to find out.